The child does not want to learn: what parents should do
For most parents, clearly, the success of the child is important: its development and progress. But, as you know, everything is not always as smooth as we would like. In this article, we will look at the causes of poor academic performance and ways to solve this problem.
The entry of a child into the first grade is a new stage of growing up, where your child learns independence. And one of the frequent traps is the desire of a parent to ease the struggle with difficulties: to collect a portfolio, do lessons for it. This is one side of the question.
The second possible situation, because of which the child does not want to learn – when the parent establishes strict control. Unquestioning compliance with the requirements of parents, educational abuse about the new two not only discourage the desire to learn, but also leave a grudge in the soul.
Be an example – show a conscientious attitude to your duties.
Early rises, patiently and carefully spent hours at the Desk, the obligation to do homework: even if this process becomes habitual,it still requires a certain amount of energy. Create a convenient daily routine for your son or daughter. At the end of the school day, let your child rest for a couple of hours: let him do what he wants (walk, play, draw, etc.). And pay attention to the fact that after completing the lessons, he will be waiting for some entertainment.
The most common mistake of a parent is to make excessive demands on their young student: the parent is disappointed, and the child feels insecure. Whatever the job is, don’t give it a negative rating. Present this as the fact that at the moment you are upset about failure, but believe that next time you will succeed. Explain that a poor rating does not make a person stupid or less worthy. A bad grade is how the teacher evaluated the information learned by the student. It is a sad phenomenon when parents scold their children for poor grades, but take good results for granted. Try to make as few negative comments as possible and praise as much as possible. Call the child “smart”, “smart”, “neat”, but not Vice versa. Even if not externally, it is internally remembered and stored in the mind. Remember: knowledge and confident understanding of the subject is much more important than a mark.
Don’t be afraid to talk about your failures. Let them know that mistakes are normal for a living person.
Often complexes can occur simply due to the fact that the child has distinctive characteristics: appearance, speech defects, etc.
It is important, while remaining an authority for him, to give him your support.
High-quality assimilation of information requires concentration and perseverance. With these aspects, problems arise when your child is restless and it is extremely difficult for him to sit in one place for a long time. In the classroom, these children interfere with the rest of the students; they often want to get up during the lesson and move a lot; they attract, most often, the negative attention of teachers.
If earlier children used tablets and phones in adulthood, now parents use gadgets to turn on a cartoon to their child from the very cradle. Here, the parent’s task is to limit device usage in time.
Another factor that affects learning may be your child’s excessively long walks with friends. But don’t drive home too early. Find the middle.
Not meeting the level of the school curriculum
Smart child not weather, with small age already knows how to read and write… and learn laziness. Why do I need to study if I already know everything? If the child does not want to learn for this reason, then it should be explained that the development process is unlimited. Live and learn. If he is really bored, then you should think about a more complex in-depth training program.
What to do if the situation is reversed and the reason for the difficulty of assimilation of information? In this case, psychologists advise you to choose a correction class for the child.
Doesn’t want to study because of a boring program…
Today, it is difficult to find a school where every academic subject is interesting, and the teacher is no less creative. And it is not uncommon for students to merge “teacher” and “subject” into one whole – what relation to the teacher, such an attitude to the subject. If you are in a similar situation and your child does not want to study for this reason, show by your example how General education subjects helped you realize yourself in life. To help your child in this difficult situation, you should know his interests. Based on what your child wants to do, talk to them about what subjects they need and why.
There is no person without talent. There are people whose talent is not revealed. Take a closer look at your child. What would he like to do outside of school hours? Sign him up for extracurricular classes in a subject that he likes (math, biology, drawing, music school, drawing, etc.).
All over the world, and Russia is no exception, there is a widespread problem when children at 12-13 years old lose their desire to learn. This is due to a new stage of personal development. Occurs at puberty. During this period, it is important not to push about the fact that the child does not study and does not want to do anything at all, but to help in overcoming problems. You can hire a tutor, but so that the load remains uniform. Any person, at any age, needs rest.
Features of temperament also affect the performance of your household.
As you know, there are only 4 types of temperament in psychology
What type of nervous system the child has, this will be its performance.
Students with a weak nervous system need more breaks to restore performance.
People with a strong nervous system can do much more. It is easier for them to combine basic studies and additional classes.
Children who have a whole bunch of negative medical diagnoses often get favored by their teachers. Such a child is often pitied and helped. And why study if they don’t require much?
There are also reverse situations: at first glance, everything is fine with him, and then it turns out that the reason for low academic performance is poor health. Everyone wants to think that everything is fine with health, so parents often forget about the possibility of such a reason.
Strained relationships with classmates or a teacher
When your child’s relationship with the rest of the students or teacher is at a low level, the energy is spent not on learning, but on, at best, resolving the conflict. To be informed about the situation between them, the teacher and the rest of the children, try to give less lectures on parenting and maintain more friendly relationships. With a trusting relationship, it will be easier and faster for you to find out that something is wrong at school.
The atmosphere in the family
Frequent conflicts at home, constant irritation of parents due to fatigue after work also affect the child. Even if you cast an irritated look not at him, but at the dog, still this negative will be felt. Every adult, and especially a child, needs a home where there will be comfort, joy and harmony.
Junior, middle, and senior classes
The most common fears are
1) the Evil teacher
2) there will be no friends
3) Difficult lessons
Advice from psychologists
Before you leave and hug each other.
Put a photo in the student’s briefcase where you are together.
Let your child take their favorite toy with them
First show your child the school where he will study.
Read him a good book about school (for example, “Vitya Maleev at school and at home” by N. Nosov, or “Forest school” by M. Panfilov).
Play the game “first-Grader”: let your child collect school supplies in a briefcase and tell them what they are needed for at school.
Offer to play school: let him do the task, and then you will check this task together with a red pen and discuss the mistakes.
Rehearse how he will get up to school, collect a briefcase, where clothes will hang. This will help your child adapt to new conditions faster and save time and nerves
After your first day of school, go to the theater, movie theater, or Park with your family. Have a little celebration. Show that it is important to you that he is already grown up and goes to school.
According to psychologists, a child aged 9-12 years does not want to go to school because of poor relations with teachers.
Advice from psychologists
Talk together and find out what your child is concerned about, whether their anxiety is related to school.
Visit the teacher so that he can tell you about your child’s progress, how your child is studying, and bring some advice and recommendations
Tell your young student interesting school stories from your past, about how you studied, and look at your photos together
Praise and encourage your efforts
Take care of your child’s experiences, try to listen
If your child complains about the teacher, come to the school and solve this problem
Most students at this age already know what they want to do and who they will be. Disciplines that have nothing to do with the future profession are no longer so interesting.
Often at this age, there are many Hobbies (sports, music, drawing, etc.) and study goes by the wayside.
If you notice that your child is not interested in going to school, does not want to study, does not want to do lessons, dreams of something of their own, talk to them, find out what they are really interested in. It’s important to make it clear that you care about more than just his grades. Try to maintain a warm relationship.
At any age, you can explain to a child why they study and get an education.